Addressing ‘The Guilt’: A Guide to Help Your Dog Feel Secure When Home Alone

My dog’s entry to my house was an absolute s***show. I wasn't ready to be a parent, my parents were ready to be grandparents, and my grandparents weren't ready for the little menace to be a permanent resident.

Among the whirlwind of things that I faced, learned, and changed was addressing ‘THE GUILT”. Now, every dog parent out there knows exactly what I’m talking about. But for those who are yet to be blessed with a pup in their life — let me explain.

Every parent goes through something called parental guilt. According to various psychological sites on trusty old Google, parental guilt is a feeling that you are not doing enough as a parent. It includes a sense that your parenting is not meeting your child's needs or that your actions are negatively affecting your child in the long run.

Now apply the same to a dog parent. Let me draw up the most common and relatable situation for a better understanding.

Situation: You’ve just gotten a new pup to your home. She is having a few issues adjusting but is an absolute angel. She needs you around well for emotional support and to guide her through a lot of things that are new to her.

You quite obviously don't trust her enough to leave her home alone but that's also because you love her and don't want her to feel lonely.

Now this goes on for a month and then the month turns into 2 and before you know it 6 months have passed and you haven't once stepped out of the house for anything leisurely and your previously vibrant social life was single-handedly destroyed by your angel of a pup.

You are constantly battling between leaving her for a couple of hours to revive your social life and just canceling all plans to stay home with her all your life.

While this could be possible, it's not entirely practical. Call it selfishness if you will, but I still want to go out for a quick meal or meet my friends for an evening drink.

And if you are on the same page as me and want to revive your social life, here are a few harsh truths I had to come to terms with.

1. Your dog doesn’t need your constant presence. This might seem like a stupid suggestion to someone who’s just got a pup but trust me they are going to grow up and they are going to need their ‘alone time’.
2. Your life is going to go on. The world won’t come to a halt just because you got a new puppy. As much as it is a big deal to you, not a lot of people are going to take that as a good excuse. You are going to have to go to that doctor’s appointment or you have to go shopping for that friend’s wedding. You cannot postpone everything in the name of your dog.
3. Your dog is going to be fine. They might whine and cry the first couple of times you leave them alone but with proper reinforcement and training, they are going to be used to you leaving the house for a while.
   

You probably came here looking for relatability and professional advice and I’m guessing the latter part remains unanswered.

Not to worry, I’ve got you covered. There are a few tips from canine behavior expert Kirti Tripathi on how to handle leaving your pup alone at home.

Training Tips

Teach your pup that it’s okay to be alone at home sometimes. This could be done by leaving your pup alone for short periods and gradually increasing the time. Make sure to leave them only for as long as they can handle and do not let them cry it out.

Remember to train for the moment, and NOT in the actual moment. Practice moving around in the house, getting out of sight, and coming back when your puppy is resting or is engaged in something on their own. This will teach them that even if you go out of sight, you always come back.

Now, try going into another room, closing the door behind you, and coming back before your puppy notices.

As they get more comfortable, slowly increase the time. Once they’re used to this, practice using the main door. Leave and return a few times, gradually extending the time you stay away.

Pre-departure Prep

Before leaving your dog alone, ensure they’re physically and mentally enriched. Take them for a walk and let them sniff around. Mentally engage them with a training session, a puzzle toy, or a licki mat to tire them out. Remember, a dog whose basic needs are met will be at their best.

Try filling in your pup's puzzles and licki mats with sploot’s fresh food- for a healthier alternative.

Things to Keep in Mind

Make sure your dog is comfortable before you leave. Provide access to fresh water and ensure they’re exercised and fed. Choose a safe area free of hazards like wires or boxes to avoid accidents especially if it is a younger dog or a dog that is not housebroken.

Use baby gates, playpens, or closed doors to limit access to the house, and remove anything the pup could damage. Create a calm, cozy space for your puppy to relax—a well-ventilated room with the curtains drawn and soft music or TV noise to mask outdoor sounds, helping your pup rest more easily.

And your biggest concern — how to deal with ‘THE GUILT’. If you’ve followed at least a few of these tips, chances are your pup will be satisfied and hopefully too tired to miss you.

And if you are the one feeling restless, you can always invest in an economical indoor camera and set it up so you have an idea of how your puppy is actually doing when left alone. Always remember you do not have to let the puppy cry it out and wait for him to settle down before you come back.

Once you are back, keep your stuff away and greet your dog!